YOU MADE IT TO THE FINALS!!!!!

Well done for making it this far in the Super Hyper Premiere League of Championship Bigwig Showoffs!!!!!

As you know the big tournament will set you against the other top two teams! TEAM STRIPEY and TEAM NEON and TEAM EIGHTIES – what a selection!.

It’s been a fierce battle between all competitors, and we hope that the Messi events of the Pork Pie Gravy fiasco has not put a dampener on anyone’s spirits. We thank the Metropolitan Police for their due dilligence in soaking up the remaining issues.

This year’s tournament will be no different to last year’s super super serious showcase of talent! After warmup exercises designed to test your prowess and determination, each team will be expected to field the following roles, on and off the pitch:

1 Mad Manager
1 Uncomfortably Large Handed Goalie
1 Marvellous Mascot
(Up to 2) Cheeky Commentators
(Up to 2) Daring Streakers
(Up to 3) Rowdy Super Fans

Decide amongst your team who will play these roles! Do it asap!

Remember that all these roles sit alongside the need to put 5 players on the pitch! You can be a player AND a role at the same time.

If your team has 10 members, then you can rotate your subs accordingly. When you’re off the pitch, remember to stay in your role!

Your role will require you to a simple task during the tournament. Complete you task and you will be rewarded with a GOLD CARD – equal to one goal at the end of the tournament! So if you don’t play o nthe pitch, you can slam it off the pitch and help your team!

Each role will also need to bring the following equipment:

Manager – Hilarious wig and suit jacket
Goalie – Giant foam hands
Mascot – Animal costume to represent your team
Commentator – Fake microphone, flatcap, novelty glasses
Streaker – Keep your clothes on! Bring a novelty apron with naked body on the front, or some other lewd item of clothing
Super Fans – Scarves, flags, banners

The energy is high, the fans are ready, and you have what it takes to win the tournament. Good luck!